I have been a very good girl, food-wise. I have been drinking lots of water every day and eating lots of vegetables. I haven’t brought anything into this house that I shouldn’t eat, and I haven’t craved them. Yet. I know that the beginning is easier when you’re determined and hopeful, but it gets tougher along the way when you see other people eating the things you used to eat. Skinny people. And you start to feel bitter and resentful. And like you just want one bag of chips, dammit. Just one trip to McDonald’s, for crying out loud. Just one helping of tiramisu, for the love of God! I’m not looking forward to that when the time comes, but gosh darnit, I’ll be ready to battle the craving monsters when they attack this time! I’m getting ahead of myself. The past week was good. Food-wise.
I have been so cranky that I’ve wished that I could take a walk to get away from myself. But everywhere I go, there I am! I couldn’t figure out why I was so moody. There’s nothing about my new eating habits that I’m really not enjoying so far. Isn’t eating healthy supposed to make you feel good? Where’s all this crazy coming from?
I was reading SkinnyHollie’s blog and a light bulb went on above my head. I looked up and said, “What the heck is that?” Oh! Detox! "When you cut anything out of your diet that isn’t good for you, your body will go through a detox,” her blog read. My body has been freaking out at me for not giving it all the crap that it’s used to having. Well, suck it up, body. You’re just going to have to get used to it.
I stepped on the Wii Fit board this morning, nervously. I didn’t know what to expect. I know that I’ve been eating well and been more active, but haven’t noticed a difference in the way that I look or feel yet. I pointed the Wiimote at the screen and clicked the ‘A’ button. I stared at the screen. I couldn’t believe what I was looking at. “Holy cow,” I finally said. Patience looked up and asked what I was holy cowing about. “I lost six pounds since last week,” I told her.
Six pounds. Six pounds where? What does six pounds look like? What does six pounds feel like? I am not sure where this six pounds has come from, but I’ll take it. Er… leave it? I am sure that most of it is water weight, but six pounds is six pounds. It doesn’t have to be fat loss, as long as I’ve lost six pounds of something that wasn’t supposed to be there. I’ve been looking in the mirror and pressing on different parts of my body trying to figure out where I lost six pounds from. As neat as it would be to lose six pounds from one place at once, I’m thinking it’s probably a little here and a little there. I do feel less pressure just below my ribcage now that I’m paying attention.
So, Patience and I did a little celebration dance in the living room. And for the first time in about seven days I didn’t feel like ripping anyone’s arm off and slapping them with the wet end. This is a good start.